A Perfect Fit

So, it has been a while since I have been on here. I have a feeling all of my upcoming posts could begin with that sentence. It has been so busy in our household lately, just like everyone else I guess. Some exciting things are happening....

A couple of weeks ago, we loaded up in the car and headed over to Mim's Park to sign Nathan up for his second year of t-ball. He is excited and we are too. He has made such progress since last year. I think he will really enjoy it more this year too. When we arrived at the park and went in to the park office, there was a lot of hustle and bustle with parents signing their kids up for ball. There were team jerseys hanging up all around and as soon as Luke saw them, he was so excited. He started pointing to them and talking. I told the woman at the desk that we were there to sign Nathan up for ball. Luke spoke up and said "Lu pay too." He thought we were there to sign him up as well. We had talked about it. There is a Challenger league at another park that is for kids with disabilities but we thought it might be better to wait another year before pursuing this with Luke.

At Mim's, there is a 4 year old league which is more for the parents than for the kids! It is simply instructional, no score is kept at the games. Just trying to teach them the basics. To say Luke was excited is really an understatement. Another worker there that night asked if we wanted to sign Luke up too. We were hesitant but we told them about Luke, his autism, and our concerns. They were so welcoming and encouraged us to sign Luke up. The manager bent down to talk to Luke. He asked Luke if he liked to hit the ball. Luke: "I hit ball." He asked Luke if he liked to run fast. Luke: "I run fast." Then Luke said once again, "I pay too." We decided to go for it.

He had is first practice last week and I guess it went as well as could be expected. It takes a great deal of patience to be a coach, and extra if you coach t-ball, and a monumental amount if you coach 4 year old t-ball.
Luke's coach is so very kind and patient. Of course, parent participation is absolutely necessary to keep the kids focused on what they are supposed to be doing. Roger spent the entire practice with Luke on the field. He was working so hard to help Luke. All went well until he tried to put a helmet on Luke's head. That's when Luke lost it. He cried and cried and would not wear one. If he doesn't wear a helmet, he can't bat. Park rules. So, after some time, we were able to calm him and he finished the practice out in the field with his team.

This was hard. I haven't thought about what a father must feel like when he sees his son is different than other kids his age. I have been in situations before where I was so very aware that my child was different and it was so hard for me. Now, Roger was experiencing it in a very real way. This is going to be a challenge for us over the next couple of months. We know that it is going to be good for Luke, but I think it is Roger and I that will be learning the lessons the most. It's hard not to compare. We are so guilty of it. No matter how hard we try, we see others his age and think "that's what Luke should be doing now." It's not fair to him. He is precious and doesn't deserve to be compared because he is extraordinary just as he is. So, we all have our challenges ahead this ball season.

One of the first challenges is just trying to get Luke to wear a helmet. His little head, well, is not all that little. Nathan's helmet is too small for Luke and it hurts his head. So, we went to Academy Sports in search of a helmet. We just might have tried on every helmet there and it wasn't looking good. And then, there was that moment, maybe like when the slipper went on Cinderella's foot. He picked up a helmet and put it on and smiled his sweet Lukey smile, dimples and all. Eureka! We found it! Perfect fit! Roger took the boys, who were growing restless, to the car and I headed to the check out with our prized helmet. We didn't bother looking at price tags when trying on helmets, seriously didn't even think about it. We were in desperation mode. No helmet, no t-ball. That was our thinking. Then the worker scanned the helmet. My jaw dropped and I was had to take a moment. Are you serious? I bought it anyway and told the lady that I would probably be back the next morning to return it. I won't tell you how much it cost, only that if not Luke, someone in this family will be wearing that helmet for years to come. The great news is that he loves it and will wear it without crying. He has slept with it in his bed for the past couple of nights and even wore it to breakfast one morning. We may actually make it to the first game now. I can't think beyond that.

Here we are. Starting on a new adventure. We are mingling with the general population. This is out of our comfort zone. Our school friends know us. Our church friends know us. But now, our ball park friends have got to get to know us and Luke. We are exposed to new people and new things. We did this last year with Nathan and it was good. But now, our child with autism is playing t-ball with typical kids. This puts him in a new light. I try to think of it as opportunity to educate others, maybe break down stereotypes. But that is my thinking on a strong day. In reality, I am scared. That is my thinking on a weak day. I don't want him to be labeled or made fun of. I have trouble dealing with other people who may not be so kind. I want to protect him. At least, that is what I say. I guess in reality, I want to protect me. Staying to ourselves, sheltering him is not the answer. That's not always what is best for him. My sweet, social little guy is getting to experience something new, something I wasn't sure he would get to do. That is exciting! I am so happy and thankful that he is able to take part in this. He is going to learn and grow so much. We are all going to learn through this - maybe a little about t-ball and a lot about ourselves. Maybe we can teach others about autism along the way.